Somehow, and I have no idea how this happened, I am #1 in Yahoo Sports’ College Pick’em game for college football picks against the spread. I have a 137-89 record as you can see from the screenshot above, and that is despite the fact that my “Rosen for Roses” name betrays the fact that I thought that my UCLA Bruins could contend this year. It is also probably a shock for any of you who have seen how lousy my NFL picks have been.
So, because I would imagine that I never again have the opportunity to say that I am the nation’s top college football sage by four games ever again, below are my picks for the games this weekend using Yahoo’s assigned spreads. As you will come to find out, I know far less about college football than one would think and my strategy for most games is pretty simple: Vegas doesn’t like losing money.
ILLINOIS +10 VS. IOWA
82% of people on Yahoo picked Iowa. Vegas does not like losing money.
OHIO STATE -21.5 AT MICHIGAN STATE
Urban Meyer is no stranger to running up scores. He needs statement wins to secure a college football playoff spot. MSU is 3-7 against the spread.
KANSAS STATE -2 AT BAYLOR
I can’t root for Baylor. They should suspend the program.
OKLAHOMA STATE +4.5 AT TCU
One of my best friends lives in Oklahoma and is a huge Oklahoma State fan. They have become my de facto team to root for after UCLA is out of contention late in the season. Go Pokes! (You’re starting to wonder how I’m #1 in the nation at picking college football games, aren’t you?)
VIRGINIA +11 AT GEORGIA TECH
79% of people on Yahoo picked Georgia Tech. Vegas does not like losing money.
MIAMI (FL) -3 AT N.C. STATE
The Hurricanes have to turn it around at some point, right? Plus, The U is one of my favorite 30 for 30s.
OREGON +14.5 AT UTAH
88% of people on Yahoo picked Utah. Vegas does not like losing money.
DUKE +7.5 AT PITTSBURGH
78% of people on Yahoo picked Pittsburgh. Vegas does not like losing money.
SYRACUSE +21 VS. FLORIDA STATE
76% of people on Yahoo picked Florida State. Vegas does not like losing money.
IOWA STATE +3 VS. TEXAS TECH
Despite how dreamy Texas Tech’s Ryan Gosling look-a-like coach is, 82% of people on Yahoo picked Texas Tech and as such, I must pick Iowa State. I think you know why by now.
NORTHWESTERN -1 AT MINNESOTA
I always find that Northwestern is underrated and that Minnesota is not.
WESTERN MICHIGAN -33.5 VS. BUFFALO
Buffalo still has some name recognition from the Turner Gill years. They shouldn’t. 3-7 against the spread this year.
MISSOURI +16 AT TENNESSEE
81% of people on Yahoo picked Tennessee. You know the drill.
NOTRE DAME -1 VS. VIRGINIA TECH
Notre Dame will close the season somewhat competently and save Coach Kelly’s job. It’s kind of like when you have a horrible golf round but birdie the 18th hole to keep you coming back.
UTAH ST. -6.5 AT NEVADA
I think Yahoo just puts games like this on the sheet to torture us. Just take your best guess. Both teams are horrible both in terms of actual record and record against the spread.
CALIFORNIA +10.5 VS. STANFORD
Cal is better than you think and this is a rivalry game.
ARKANSAS +2 AT MISSISSIPPI STATE
I’m not sure what I’m missing here. I feel like Arkansas should be a four or five point favorite.
ARIZONA STATE +27 AT WASHINGTON
Washington has got to be deflated after losing its national title hopes last week against USC. I don’t expect them to be as crisp as they were prior to the USC loss.
RUTGERS +28 VS. PENN STATE
I know Rutgers is horrible. But you know what’s more horrible? That feeling of picking Penn State while still remembering the name Jerry Sandusky.
OKLAHOMA -2.5 AT WEST VIRGINIA
This is the time of year when Bob Stoops wins. His teams always excel mid-season only to fall apart late.
ARIZONA +6.5 AT OREGON STATE
78% of people on Yahoo picked Oregon State. Vegas isn’t like President-Elect Trump. Vegas casino owners make money.
UCLA +10.5 VS. USC
I went to UCLA so I always pick them. Thankfully, my Bruins haven’t been relevant enough for Yahoo to make their games one of the ones you have to pick from too often this season. Plus, 84% of people on Yahoo have USC. By now, you’re probably looking at me as you do that co-worker’s eight year old son who somehow won your March Madness pool despite knowing about 1/100th as much about the sport as you do. The English language has a word for that: Jealousy!